A message to those who have been hurt by love !

To begin with, I have never thought that I would be writing this message. 'be in a position to write this message" would have been more opt words.

Yes, I know divine and true love is possible. I know how pity they look -- the ones who voluntarily come forward to advise you that (s)he isn't the only one and why don't you just move on. We pity them and their advise because they simply don't understand what true love is. They fail to acknowledge the fact that even at it's worst moments, true love finds it's tiniest hope that things will be alright and hangs onto it. When you love someone truly, how could you accept a break up for it simply will shatter your heart, your dreams and your life. Yes, I understand and I could empathize with you on this for sure. I know you would have thought many times to end your life yourself and you are also convinced that you have the most genuine reason to proceed with such decision irrespective of how stupid it may sound to others. The others -- they never understand. I know. You are willing to wait unconditionally taking all the pains and ready to face the hell on earth so that you could still hang onto your love and that your hoping of that magic may happen any time. You are all forgiving. You are all sacrificing. You are all ready to compromise. After all, it's all for the one whom you truly, madly and deeply love.

But my dear friend, I have to tell you something. Something that you don't know. Something that you could see only when you pass this phase. So hold tight. I'm not going to promise you that things will become alright and that your love will start blossoming again. It may or may not. While I unconditionally agree that your love is genuine and true, my dear friend, I have to say that you still haven't touched the core of it yet. The part where even with true love, you can see the reality. The moment when you would realize letting go does not mean end of love. It doesn't make your true love untrue. While it may be the most painful thing to let go of the one you love, touching the bottom of true love indeed helps you to understand the circumstances and reality and that letting go is part of life. Life doesn't end there. You may not be able to move on but you can definitely take an effort. There will be someone coming onto you, who will change things in your life. You don't have to move on, they will move you. You will no longer have to stand in there where you were fighting with pain all alone. Someone will come in your life. Keep the door open. I know you may find difficulty to walk to the door to unlock even if someone knocks. So keep the door open, so when someone wants to come in, they can get in and reach you.

There is a great saying, "Some day, there will be a person coming in your life and makes you forget all your pain, makes you feel the love (again) and shows a bright life of future. Not because they are better than the other person, but because they are simply different". (I customized the quote to convey the essence of the message)

Yes, you can fall in love with more than one person -- truly, madly and deeply. There is no better love for love can't be compared with one another. There is love, that's all.

Paul Arockiam.
27-Aug-2014.

[ Love of P&T ] True Love !!

The great thing about love is that hope always stays with you, even at it's thinnest level irrespective of how worst the condition of your love life is. You believe that things will be back to normal some day. You are all forgiving. In fact, a true love always have reverse effect with respect to the condition of life. When the life gets worse, the love becomes stronger than ever before. You find yourself more determined, even though your inside may feel that your life is being threatened. You refuse to believe that reality could have control over the life and that it can change things permanently. You strongly believe that Love over powers the reality; it had always been so and it will always be so.

A love does not blame the other person. Not even when things fall apart. It always gets upset about the situation. It may curse the gods, but never blames the other person. As a matter of fact, it holds the other person tighter than before.

A true love is rare to find, impossible to forget and it never dies. When you find such love, the world becomes smaller. The sky stays at reachable height. You know you can start or stop the rains by a word or hug. The rainbows are what you paint. Even when the life is at stake, you believe that you can manage. You can survive. Even if you are burned alive, you raise like a phoenix. You find strategies to conquer those that might have been taken away from you. You fight like a gladiator. Even if you die, you die like a brave soldier. Your soul may leave your body but love stays in your frozen eyes.

Paul Arockiam.
13-Aug-2014.

[ பரிந்துரை ] உன் சமையலறையில் (தமிழ் திரைப்படம்)

எதேச்சையாய் அல்ல. பார்க்க வேண்டும் என்று தான் பார்த்தேன். ஏனோ பிரகாஷ்ராஜ் ப்ரொடெக்ஷன்ஸ் மேல் எப்போதுமே ஒரு நம்பிக்கை உண்டு.

என்ன என்று சொல்வது இப்படத்தை பற்றி..? படத்தின் முதல் காட்சியில் உங்களுக்கு வாய் ஊறவில்லை என்றால் மிகவும் முக்கியமான ஒன்றை சிறுவயதில் அனுபவிக்காமல் கடந்திருக்கிறீர்கள் என்று அர்த்தம். முதல் பாடலின் காட்சியமைப்பு எவ்வளவு அழகு என்றால், காட்சிகளின் மேலே போடப்பட்டுக் கொண்டிருக்கும் பெயர்களை படிக்க நீங்கள் மறந்திருப்பீர்கள். அவ்வளவு அழகான காட்சியமைப்பு.. வண்ணமயம்.. வாயூறும் சுவை..

நான் கிரகிக்க முடிந்தவரையில் படம் மூன்று தளங்களில் நகர்கின்றது. ஒரு தளம் வாய் ஊற வைக்கின்றது. இன்னொரு தளம் செய்வதறியாது உதவ இயலாத நிலையில் நம்மை தள்ளி விட்டு நிஜத்தின் கொடூர முகத்திற்கு நம்மை சாட்சிகள் ஆக்குகின்றது. கடைசி தளம் மிகவும் உணர்ச்சிமிக்க (sensitive) வாழ்வின் ஒரு பகுதியை நளினமிக்க கவிதை நடையில் காட்டுவதோடு மட்டும் நில்லாமல், தீர்வுகளை நாம் தான் தேடித் போக வேண்டும் என்னும் மிக முக்கிய யதார்த்தத்தை மென்மையான தென்றலின் தீண்டலுடன் சொல்லி விட்டு செல்கிறது.

படத்தின் பின் பகுதியை கொஞ்சமேனும் சுருக்கி இருக்கலாம் என்று எண்ணலாம் சிலர். எனக்கென்னவோ நான் குறிப்பிட்ட மூன்றாம் தளத்தின் உணர்ச்சிகளை வெளிக்கொணர்வதற்கு அது ஒருவகையில் தேவையான ஒன்றே என்று தோன்றியதால் அதன் நீளத்தை குறையென்று சொல்வதற்கு ஒன்றுமில்லை.

திரைப்படத்தின் காட்சியமைப்புகளில் தெளித்திருக்கும் வண்ணமயத்தில் நீங்கள் மயங்கி உங்களையே மறந்து ரசிக்காமல் இருக்க வாய்ப்பில்லை.

உன் சமையலறையில் ஒரு கலைஞனின் கலையுணர்வும் அதன் மீதான காதலும் எல்லையற்று பரந்து விரிந்து கிடக்கிறது. ஆங்காங்கே கதையின் போக்கில் சில நெருடல்களைத் தவிர குறையென்று சொல்வதற்கு வேறு எதுவுமே இல்லை.

உன் சமையலறையில்: எல்லாம் மிகவும் ருசியே.

பால் ஆரோக்கியம்.

Attitude towards the shadow

It isn't the memories that put us down. It's our attitude towards the same. For some people, like me, it isn't that they can't let go of something. They just don't want to. Fighting the battle that has never been meant to them. Claiming upstairs to catch the stars like a child. For a child, it is the innocence and the ignorance about the fact that stars can't be caught by walking up the stairs. But for us, adults, it is the attitude that results in burning our energy in the most wasteful way.

Sometimes I tend to think it is always good not to have something you wanted during your childhood, face failures during your young age, being rejected even before you get matured enough to understand that. You see, that helps you grow. As a matter of fact, those are the things that brings you the maturity to handle your life and creates an easy to handle future.

I'm concerned the way most kids are brought up in today's world. The attitude of revenge of parents to get those to their kids, which they couldn't get for themselves during their growing up ages. It worries me. Will they be able to handle the cruelty of the world as they grow older..?

Having said all these, we always have a statement to console us, our kids and the world, "at the end, it all boils down to the fate!". Don't we..?

Paul Arockiam.
04-Aug-2014.

Something about Friendship Day..

While very young, I used to wish every so called friend on Friendship Day. When I started growing mature, it occur to me that Friendship Day is a special day and therefore it would only make sense to wish those friends who are special in one way or other. It has become tradition in here that every 'known' person is called as friend and therefore the word 'friend' started losing it's significance. To compensate that, we started adding prefix to the word "good friends", "best friends", "close friends" etc which are supposedly be having it's own special significance themselves.

This is where I started having problem to wish on Friendship day. Ever since I started feeling that it is a special day and we are supposedly be celebrating those significant ones who make difference in our life and wish them on that day, it started drawing attention (in some ways, negative), envy, jealous and hatred from those whom we don't see as friends.

Few years back, I wrote a special poetic message on the Friendship Day and uploaded in Facebook tagging only those who have made a difference in my life as friends. Soon, I realized that it is likely to be seen as a controversial post from those other people whom I didn't tag since the post has become a public display of affection towards my real friends. So in order not to hurt any of those other people, I started tagging almost everyone and then a little later I removed all the tagging since I felt that just doesn't make sense.

That's when I decided perhaps Friendship Day, which draws the attention easily, need not be the only day when you let someone know that they are your valued friend and that they are special in your life. So I stopped wishing people on that day. After all, a wish to a person on Friendship Day hardly could mean something unlike where you have kept that person in your mind and heart.

Paul Arockiam.
03-Aug-2014.

These days..

Has been a while since I posted something, isn't it..? I know. In a way, I'm pretty busy with living my life but I find it difficult to justify why I don't write. There is indeed a lot to write these days, more than ever.

It is surprising to hear how some of my good friends are deeply happy about the recent developments in my personal life. It is also equally surprising not to hear anything from some of my other, good, friends. They may be not that very expressive in nature, I would like to think. I know what will happen eventually, but lets just save those thoughts for future.

These days I receive a lots of complaints like my phone is always engaged, I'm unavailable for anything, probably having a specific type of amnesia, I write-talk about nothing but love etc. Some may even seem to have complaint that I'm happy these days. Probably they must be thinking that it is not good for health.

Sometimes I feel that for the best interest of both sides, it is good not to get deeper into what someone thinks these days. I actually wrote the strategy I follow to deal with people but then I thought let it be a secret to myself. So I just back-spaced the statement.

Paul Arockiam.
03-Aug-2014.