How long it has been since I posted something here!
Was I busy, I am not really sure. Busy couldn't be the answer. Being busy does not define what you do or want to do. At least, it should not. When you are passionate (or interested) about something, you would always find time to do it.
So, the right answer, then, would be diverted. Yes, that sounds about right. I was diverted towards many different things, people and relationships. So 'why return now' is the question to be. I know the answer, but probably that's not something that I would like to admit or disclose. Let that stay private.
When my mind has been wandering these days, the question I had kept asking myself was, 'what's that one thing that can help me get back to the life of peace and happiness'. The answer was writing, of course. So here I'm. At the same time, I'm not trying to imply I wasn't at peace or not happy.
I have experienced so much these days. So many ups and downs. So many loses and few gains. The emotional journey had been a rollercoaster ride. One of the reasons I stopped writing was that my posts had started being perceived or connected towards certain people or incidents. But which writing isn't. The question to be asked is of the intentions. Were my intentions to point out people or incidents? Certainly not. But how can I express the way I see things without the elements that would relate to the people or incidents or what's happening around me? My intentions had always been to write them in non-judgemental ways and that's how it should be viewed too.
Whenever I post, I imagine posting to a dark abyss. That has always been my audience. I have always imagined myself shouting at the endlessness that expands in front of me if I were standing on top of a mountain.
So, here I'm. Again standing on top of the mountain. Let me see if the momentum continues. Let me see if it helps me catch my breath.
--
Paul | பவுல்.
Was I busy, I am not really sure. Busy couldn't be the answer. Being busy does not define what you do or want to do. At least, it should not. When you are passionate (or interested) about something, you would always find time to do it.
So, the right answer, then, would be diverted. Yes, that sounds about right. I was diverted towards many different things, people and relationships. So 'why return now' is the question to be. I know the answer, but probably that's not something that I would like to admit or disclose. Let that stay private.
When my mind has been wandering these days, the question I had kept asking myself was, 'what's that one thing that can help me get back to the life of peace and happiness'. The answer was writing, of course. So here I'm. At the same time, I'm not trying to imply I wasn't at peace or not happy.
I have experienced so much these days. So many ups and downs. So many loses and few gains. The emotional journey had been a rollercoaster ride. One of the reasons I stopped writing was that my posts had started being perceived or connected towards certain people or incidents. But which writing isn't. The question to be asked is of the intentions. Were my intentions to point out people or incidents? Certainly not. But how can I express the way I see things without the elements that would relate to the people or incidents or what's happening around me? My intentions had always been to write them in non-judgemental ways and that's how it should be viewed too.
Whenever I post, I imagine posting to a dark abyss. That has always been my audience. I have always imagined myself shouting at the endlessness that expands in front of me if I were standing on top of a mountain.
So, here I'm. Again standing on top of the mountain. Let me see if the momentum continues. Let me see if it helps me catch my breath.
--
Paul | பவுல்.
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